WORDS BY CHERRY DIPIETRANTONIO
Content warning: This article discusses the topic of addiction.
How does a health-focused yoga teacher, who rarely drinks alcohol, refuses gas during childbirth, and lives a life dedicated to physical and mental health, find herself in a deep trap of prescription medication?
I can tell you, it’s easier than you may think…
I’ve just recently finished watching Apple Cider Vinegar, the Netflix series based on Belle Gibson, the savvy Australian wellness app creator who turned out to be little more than a disturbed con artist, deceiving her millions of followers into believing she was battling a multitude of cancer diagnoses.
It was great television, powerful viewing, and an outstanding cast, no doubt.
But for someone like me who’s worked in the wellbeing space for 11 years, I found it particularly painful to watch.
Unexpected detour
Let’s face it, the world of ‘wellness’ can quite often be a whole lot of smoke and mirrors; a facade of squeaky-clean living that can mask unhealthy and obsessive behaviours.
I’ve always been ‘middle ground’ when it comes to traditional medicine and alternative healing methods.
I understand the conventional option is necessary for many people, keeping them alive and well. My family is included in this.
For me, given my career as a yoga teacher, I prefer the alternative options for maintaining my health. This includes vitamin supplements, acupuncture, chiropractors and, of course, yoga and breathing techniques.
However, I took an unexpected detour off my preferred course.
“I no longer felt safe in my world”
Despite all my learned knowledge gained throughout decades of study, and extensive work within the health and wellbeing industry, when a chronic disease struck my immediate family two years ago, it turned my world upside down.
This part is not my story to tell, but it is the start of how and why I found myself here. Whilst adjusting to the diagnosis, we experienced an aggressive home invasion which spiralled my anxiety further.
I took to sleeping nervously on the couch, which led to my search for new ways to manage and self soothe.
My library of natural options was failing to give me the quick fix solution that I was after. I no longer felt safe in my world.
I’d slipped out of what I like to think of as peacefully empowered, to anxiously demoralised.
The trap
It was around this time that I ended up having a wisdom tooth out. This should have been a standard life experience, but it came with a prescription for opioids to help ease the pain.
I’ll be honest, I enjoyed the buzz it gave me, and the sense of being energised, even if it was short-lived.
Soon after the high, however, my energy would slump, and my mood seesawed between vacant to tense.
Somewhere along the line I was prescribed a synthetic opioid. This was the trap, it had me in its clutches.
Whilst navigating this unexpected experience, I discovered that when you are above average on the health spectrum, work as a yoga teacher, and present with a friendly demeanour in soft palette Lululemon yoga gear, some doctors are more than willing to write those prescriptions.
And yet, despite my appearance exhibiting that I had my life together, privately I was descending into a dangerous prescription hell.
As my dependence took hold, I became increasingly creative in my efforts of why I needed a new script. I was on a first-term basis with everyone at the pharmacy, although I think they had their suspicions.
And yet the cycle continued. My quest to self-soothe morphed into self-deception, I believed the medication was helping me cope.
The ‘a ha’ moment
Late last year a chronic headache appeared with immediate onset and wouldn’t respond to medication.
I stumbled across an online talk by a Melbourne-based Neurologist/Headache Specialist. This was ‘a ha’ moment I needed.
It was simple, I had what’s known as ‘MOH’, which stands for Medication Overuse Headache.
With this new insight, I decided to throw every single medication I had in the bin.
Although in truth, I kept them close by for an extra few hours before finally disposing of them, conscious that I needed a strategy to combat any potential desperate bid to fish my stash back out.
One personality strength I’m grateful for is that once I decide on something, I challenge myself, and I stick to it.
This played in my favour as I went cold turkey, despite the recommendation on the video from my new favourite health guru, who explained going cold turkey in these instances should be supervised in the hospital.
Walking the path
Coming off the meds was nowhere near as tough as I imagined.
I was inspired by a friend who is a doctor who once said to me concerning addiction, “If you take something away, you need to replace it with something.”
I had to get active and curious to find new approaches to extract myself from my medication addiction and to heal myself. I embarked on gaining a new qualification as a Pranayama Teacher, teaching breath practises, and I went back to leaning on my trusted alternative health methods.
It took nearly 8 weeks for the headache to go away completely, but eventually my nervous system, sleep, mood, clarity of mind and pupil size, all journeyed back to a place of equilibrium.
Being well is a lifelong commitment, I’m fortunate in my good physical health, and yet circumstantial emotional dysfunction led me to make choices that made me feel far from well.
As we live in a time of unlimited access to information from so-called experts, the lesson that revealed itself to me is a powerful one.
We are always our own best teachers, and teachers just like doctors, neurologists, pharmacists, and wellness bloggers, make mistakes and are still learning on the job. You can do years of study, read all the books, consult all the experts, but sometimes you’ll only truly figure it out once you have walked the path.
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